Brian's headstone was finally installed last week.
Of course it was on the busiest day before we went out of town, so we didn't get a chance to stop by. Tonight we made it! I don't know what it is about having a stone, but I LOVE it!! I also love the experience I have with Harper each time we go to the cemetery. She talks directly to him. Tells him she loves him. Knows that it can be sad and happy at the same time. Harper was most excited because she has been wanting to step on other stones every time we visit, but I didn't think that would be too appropriate. But I know Brian would LOVE her walking on his. So when we were there tonight, while climbing all over his stone, she said, "We will always talk about Daddy forever." She fluffed his flowers in his vase and talked about how the letter T in Daddy's name is the same letter as her bestie from school. Harper's ability to handle this situation, to really get it, and to see her process things so honestly really makes my heart feel so much better. As we were driving out she said, "I really wish I could hug him, kiss him, high five, and pinky promise him, and then he could be in his grave." Gah! Me too! Just one more time! If you know Brian, you know he loved a pinky promise. She has made the hug, kiss, high five and pinky promise part of our nightly routine. She added these all on her own. She takes the time to kiss 8 spots on face before giving me the final one on my lips. Her bedtime handshake makes me think of him every night and I love that her little heart is thinking of him too.
Of course it was on the busiest day before we went out of town, so we didn't get a chance to stop by. Tonight we made it! I don't know what it is about having a stone, but I LOVE it!! I also love the experience I have with Harper each time we go to the cemetery. She talks directly to him. Tells him she loves him. Knows that it can be sad and happy at the same time. Harper was most excited because she has been wanting to step on other stones every time we visit, but I didn't think that would be too appropriate. But I know Brian would LOVE her walking on his. So when we were there tonight, while climbing all over his stone, she said, "We will always talk about Daddy forever." She fluffed his flowers in his vase and talked about how the letter T in Daddy's name is the same letter as her bestie from school. Harper's ability to handle this situation, to really get it, and to see her process things so honestly really makes my heart feel so much better. As we were driving out she said, "I really wish I could hug him, kiss him, high five, and pinky promise him, and then he could be in his grave." Gah! Me too! Just one more time! If you know Brian, you know he loved a pinky promise. She has made the hug, kiss, high five and pinky promise part of our nightly routine. She added these all on her own. She takes the time to kiss 8 spots on face before giving me the final one on my lips. Her bedtime handshake makes me think of him every night and I love that her little heart is thinking of him too.
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